Untitled: Brain Dump 01

look inside yourself my boy.

Solitude is a painting by Olga Gorbacheva

I've been searching for answers for as long as I can remember. Some days, no matter where I look, I just can’t seem to find them. But with or without those answers, the journey never stops.

Lately, I’ve noticed I’m looking everywhere—sometimes in the same places over and over.

• In the familiar corners of Syracuse.

• In music: Drake - 7am On Bridle Path, Larry June - 60 Days, Brent Faiyaz - F**k the World

• In series and movies: Power, Black Mirror, Kodachrome, The Harder They Fall

• In books: The Birth of Venus, The Superior Man, Brief Answers to the Big Questions.

• In online content: Paulie B. Walkie Talkie’s YouTube series.

• In interpersonal relationships.

• In Twitter/X think pieces.

But I’ve been overlooking the one place that matters most: inside myself. It’s a skill many, myself included, have or continue struggle to with. Balancing external exploration with self-reflection is crucial. But I’m realizing that looking outward has its time and place—just as looking inward does.My journey through photography, for example. I learned the basic technical skills of cameras on YouTube. But it wasn’t until I scaled back on consuming content, picked up my camera, and got outside that I truly started to understand photography. I spent hours frustrated, wondering why I wasn’t getting the results I wanted.

Reflecting now, it was clear: I was caught in analysis paralysis. I was too busy looking at other people’s work instead of focusing on my own progress. For me that lesson translates to every aspect of life. Life throws curveballs—from work, finances, relationships, goals, and more. And the recurring theme is simple: to find clarity, I need to look within. Whether it's through artistic expression, my W2 job, personal finances, or relationships, everything points back to one truth: Doing and being better starts inside.